Chapter 19 - Um, yeah. Good call. I wouldn’t want to hurt my hunka-hunka-burning-love like that.

Taylor

“So then she said that she really likes me,” I babbled, handing Abby a piece of tape as she stuck a large pumpkin decoration on the wall. It was Monday, and we’d just begun our day’s detention. We’d finally managed to finish decorating the first floor of the school and now graduated to the second floor. “She’s so sweet and beautiful... I’m surprised such a perfect girl even exists!” I sighed heavily. “I’m so happy she likes me.”

“Try really freaking lucky.”

“I think fate is bringing us together because our love is pure destiny...”

“Is there a nearby balcony I can throw myself off by any chance?” Abby grumbled, looking around the hallway.

I sighed and skipped along behind her as she walked to a blank portion on the wall. “Brooke actually said, and I quote, “I just can’t get over how amazing he was.” I think the gods of love have finally decided to answer my desperate prayers!”

“I wonder if it’s possible to hang yourself with masking tape...”

“You should see the way her eyes sparkle when she laughs,” I continued, in my own little dream world. All I could see in front of me were a pair of vibrant green eyes and a brilliant smile illuminating a lovely face. “I just feel as though I’m floating on a cloud in the sky called love...”

“Taylor, that gagging noise you hear is me retching at your disgusting idiocy,” Abby muttered, bitterly. I hardly noticed her blatant lack of enthusiasm.

“And she actually thought I was a GENTLEMAN!” I exclaimed, shaking my head. “Can you imagine that? Here I thought I looked like a complete freak of nature while she saw it as having manners!”

Abby rolled her eyes and snatched the piece of tape out of my hand. “Technically, she thinks I’m a gentleman.”

I grinned. “Same difference.”

She glared at me. “Don’t talk like that. You’re insulting me.”

I sighed. Why was she doing her damndest to ruin my good mood? Seriously, how often am I genuinely happy? For once something in my life has turned out semi-okay. Can’t she at least pretend that she cares about something other than herself?

“Don’t look at me like that,” she warned, taking the roll of tape out of my hands and taking a couple of pieces to hang another obnoxious pumpkin. “I’ve been listening to you harp on about Brooke for a good half hour now. I’m tired of hearing how wonderful and perfect you are.”

“I never said I was...”

“Can you please silence yourself for a few exquisite moments?” She barked, handing me back the roll of tape. She rubbed her temples softly with her fingertips. “I was up all night trying to find some kind of cure for our ungodly situation and what were you doing exactly? Probably sitting on your lazy ass eating brownies or finding some other way to lie to Brooke about who you really are. Why don’t you just leave her alone?”

My mouth dropped. “What the fuck is your problem?”

She rolled her eyes at me and turned away. “Nothing. God, how about you just be quiet for a little while?”

I don’t know why, but Abby’s complete lack of concern really hurt my feelings. Sure, she’s usually beaming with sarcasm, but she’s usually not this nasty. We’ve always had this love/hate type of relationship but now I was really wounded by her lack of caring. It seemed to come out of nowhere, and without real cause.

“Are you mad at me for some reason?” I asked, gently. When I tried to put my hand on her shoulder she pushed it off quickly. At this point, I was incredibly taken aback. “What’s wrong?” She merely sighed and hung another pumpkin haphazardly on the wall. “Come on, Abby. Talk to me. Are you mad at me?”

She finally cracked. “No. Yes. I don’t know.”

“Okay. I’m confused.”

She smiled ruefully. “I am too.”

“About what?” I asked. There was definitely something she wasn’t telling me.

Abby opened her mouth to reply, but then shut it. She fiddled with a cardboard decoration she had in her hand for a moment or two before she found the correct words. “Do you ever think about why we fight so much?”

I grinned. “Because you are God’s way of letting me know what suffering truly is?”

She glared at me, completely not amused at my pathetic attempt at cracking a joke. “No, Taylor.”

“Because you enjoy sucking the joy out of everything you pass by?” Have I ever mentioned how much I despise uncomfortable confrontation? I try to avoid it all costs. Perhaps I could simply lighten the stifling mood by way of humor. Come on, that HAD to make her crack even a little smile.

No such luck.

“Taylor, I’m trying to…”

Okay, I’ll give humor one more shot. “Because to you inflicting pain on my poor, tormented soul gives you immense pleasure beyond all reason?”

“DAMN IT, TAYLOR!” She screamed, stomping her foot loudly on the brick floor. She winced as pain shot through her leg. “I’m trying to be serious here! Can you be normal for, like, thirty seconds before returning to your third grade mentality?”

I looked at her with enormous puppy-dog eyes. It was definitely harder to get away with being impossible when I lacked the essential piercing blue eyes. I immediately grew quiet and continued to look as frightened and innocent as I possibly could in hopes that she wouldn’t completely dismember me. I was kind of fond of my extremities.

“I don’t know how any human being could be this enormously exasperating!” She hollered. “You’d think someone would have had the decency of killing you and putting us all out of our misery by now.” She let out an aggravated grunt and flopped onto the floor. She angrily kicked the cardboard box full of decorations before sighing loudly.

I sat down beside her slowly. There was definitely something wrong with her. “Do you have to take it out on the poor cardboard pumpkins?” That earned me another frustrated glare.

I don’t want to name any names, Abigail Deluca, but someone is certainly touchy when she’s in a bad mood.

She couldn’t possibly be mad at me. Nope, I have been searching my brain for all possible ways that I could have done/said/thought something to piss her off. Try as I might to find a wrongdoing, there simply are none to be found.

“Can you just leave me alone for a little while?” Abby asked, in a small voice. I was a little surprised at the softness of it. I was shocked that she possessed anything less than the high-pitched, raging shriek of death she so eloquently unleashed on my poor, defenseless ears from time to time.

“Not until you tell me what’s bothering you,” I replied, sweetly. “Is it a person, place, or thing that’s bothering you?”

She raised an eyebrow. “Hmm… I’m not quite sure. It’s a mix between a person and a thing.”

“A mix? How can there be a…” I trailed off when I noticed her nostrils beginning to flare. “Okay, so it’s a mix. I guess that’s a start. Does it have anything to do with the Hanson family?”

“Yes.”

“Is it a member of the Hanson family?”

There was a fire in Abby’s eyes. She turned away and forced herself to look at the floor. “Maybe.”

“These are yes or no type questions here,” I stated, eyeing her suspiciously. She was acting so weird and it was definitely starting to freak me out. “Is it Zac?”

“No.”

“Is it Isaac?”

“No.”

I frowned. Scratching my chin, I gave it another try. “Is it my mom?”

Abby rolled her eyes dramatically. “You moron, you really are a blond.”

I’m just gonna let that one slide.

She IS having a bad day and all. I suppose I could forgive her for her rude little quips for now. Even though she has no business taking what’s upsetting her out on me, I’ll try my best to be a little understanding and compassionate. But if need be, I will kill her without hesitation.

“So… are you mad at my little siblings then?”

“Jesus Christ, Taylor! It’s you! YOU, you stupid ass!”

I gasped and a hand flew to my mouth. “Me?”

“YES, YOU.” She shook her head, muttering incoherently to herself.

My brow furrowed angrily as I practically jumped to my feet. “Me? What the hell have I done? You can’t possibly be angry with me! Name one thing I’ve done! Hmm? What have I done?”

She quickly stood as well. “You’re an arrogant, pompous, son of a bitch...”

“Oh, shut your trap, will you?” I shouted, getting in her face. “I’m sick and tired of your pathetic whining about every fucking thing and blaming all of your shortcomings on me…”

“Fuck you, Taylor!”

“Go fuck yourself!” I sneered, getting even closer. “I don’t even know why you’re fighting with me!”

“BECAUSE I HATE YOU!”

“OH, YEAH WELL I HATE YOU MORE!”

“Kiss me?” Abby begged.

“Till you cry.” She smashed her lips onto mine roughly and I felt all of my anger pour out of me. I tangled my hands in her hair while she possessively crushed me against her body. She groaned as our tongues massaged each other’s roughly. I had no idea what I was doing, truly, because the anger had completely taken over all of my thoughts. All I knew was the feeling of a silky tongue on mine and a burning touch of her hands on my skin.

“Oh. My. God.”

We practically pushed each other away as we heard a small voice. Logic and reason slowly made their way back to my train of thought as I apprehensively looked over to see the saddest green eyes, filled with tears, forlornly staring back at mine.

“Brooke...” I began, feeling all of the air leaving my lungs.

She tried to speak but nothing but small whimpers came out. She turned around and quickly rushed down the hallway. Giving Abby a terrified look, I bolted after Brooke.

Please tell me this wasn’t happening. First of all, Abby and I couldn’t have kissed because it’s Abby and I would never do that because I really like Brooke. And, have I failed to mention that it’s Abby? And even if hell was freezing over and Abby and I DID actually kiss, would life really hate me so much to allow Brooke to catch us?

I am so royally fucked right now.

“Brooke, please,” I begged, opening the door to the girls’ bathroom. I heard soft sniffling emanating from one of the stalls and sadly put my hand on the locked door. I never meant for this to happen. “Brooke, I really need to talk to you. Please, come out of there. I can explain…”

I think my heart broke more and more with each sob she choked down.

“You can explain?” She questioned, her words dripping with hatred. “Let me guess, it’s not what it looked like? It was an accident? I just happened to walk in at a bad time? It was completely innocent?”

“Yes!” I exclaimed, relieved. This amazing girl was so understanding. “That’s exactly what happened!”

Her stall opened and she pushed me as she stormed past me. Tears streaked down her face as some of her eyeliner was smudged around her eyes. Still sniffling violently, she wet a paper towel and blotted the wetness on her eyes, taking off the makeup. She was so beautiful when she cried.

“Brooke...” I took a step towards her.

“Don’t fucking come near me!” She warned, whirling around. She pointed a shaky finger at me. “You’re supposed to be my best friend and you stabbed me in the back! You knew I liked him and you went after him anyway!”

“No, it’s not like that!” How the hell was I supposed to explain this one?

She shook her head and more tears streamed down her flushed cheeks. “Please, spare me! I can’t believe I was stupid enough to believe you when you said you and Taylor were only friends! I really trusted you, Abby.”

I think having a cannon blast through my intestines would have been less painful than this.

“Brooke, please, let me explain myself,” I begged, taking her hand in mine. She looked as though she’d sooner slap me but allowed me to touch her. “Please.”

“Fine,” she replied, coldly. She let go of my hand, grabbed a handful of paper towels, and started blowing her nose loudly. “What could you possibly have to say for yourself?”

What did I possibly have to say for myself? Think, Hanson, think. I could just hear the clock ticking away as I struggled to find a plausible excuse. I could tell she was becoming less and less patient as I continued to hesitate.

“Well,” I began, nervously. I couldn’t blow this, not when I’d come so close to achieving happiness. “I’m not going to lie to you, Brooke. There’s nothing I can do except tell you what happened and then plead embarrassingly for your forgiveness.” Brooke bit her lip nervously. I took a deep breath. “Ab... I mean Taylor and I were bickering, like we always do. And I was really being a piss-pot. I suppose he wasn’t being exactly angelic either but anyway, I realized that all we do is fight.” Brooke’s eyes continued to burn, unforgiving, through mine. “So, we got to talking and... and I guess we thought maybe we argued so much because we were secretly attracted to one another...” Oh my God, was that true? It had to be.

I couldn’t believe it as realization washed over me. That’s why Abby had been acting so weird to me. I hadn’t done anything wrong. She... she LIKED me? I was such an idiot sometimes. How could I have not seen it?

How many times did she yell at me for nothing at all? How often did she go out of her way to aggravate me or irritate me? Was she simply trying to get my attention by becoming an unbearable thorn in my side? Was she so prickly because she had so much hidden attraction to me?

The plot thickens.

I take that back, the plot solidifies.

Brooke looked at me bravely as her lower lip quivered slightly. “And? Do you like each other?”

I looked and her and smiled with newfound relief. “No. There was honestly nothing between us.” It felt so good to say that in complete honesty. “I’m sorry you had to see that.”

Brooke sighed and wiped her eyes with a scratchy paper towel. “And that’s the honest truth?”

“I swear it.”

Brooke wiped a tear away from her eye. “And what about Taylor? Did he feel anything?”

“NO!” I exclaimed, enthusiastically.

She eyed me carefully. “How can you be so sure? You don’t know what he’s thinking. Maybe he felt all kinds of fireworks...” Her lower lip started to quiver again.

“He didn’t,” I assured her. She just had to believe me.

“But you don’t know for sure...”

“Brooke,” I began, gently. “You know when you kiss a boy and there’s no chemistry, no magic, no nothing. There’s no such thing as a one-sided kiss. It’s either there or it’s not. And it wasn’t there. It was like I was kissing my sister-er-brother.” I grinned. “We’re so alike that it was as if I was kissing myself.”

“Really?” Brooke asked, full of hope.

“I promise on my life,” I replied, giving her a warm hug. “I am so sorry I hurt you. You know I love you and would never purposely hurt you. It... it as just something we needed to get out of our systems. We just needed to make sure that the connection we had was purely platonic. And, I don’t blame you for feeling betrayed. But I promise that I will do whatever it takes to win back your trust. I’m really not a disloyal friend.”

Brooke just gazed at me with her head cocked slightly over to one side. “Okay.”

“Okay?” I repeated, dumbly.

She smiled and wiped the rest of her tears off her cheeks. “I accept your apology. Thank you for being honest and for not trying to pull some bullshit story on me.” She reached for another paper towel to blow her nose again. “I can understand why you felt you needed to kiss him.” She smiled bashfully. “He is so enamoring.”

I shrugged haphazardly. “And I swear, Brooke, he feels the same way about you.” God, did I want to kiss her. Even with blotchy cheeks and smeared eyeliner, she was the most beautiful girl I’d ever seen. I will never hurt her again.

Brooke smiled genuinely and pulled me into a warm embrace. She suddenly gasped and looked at me in horror. “Oh my God!”

“What?” I asked, fearing the worst. I prayed she hadn’t decided to be mad at me after all.

She bit her lip gravely. “What about Zac?”

“What about him?” What the hell did Zac have to do with anything?

Brooke grew quiet, as if she was afraid Zac would come barging into the girls’ bathroom to find us. Hell, Zac was probably sitting in front of the television gorging himself on potato chips and soda. I could see him now, in a beater and pajama pants, belching after taking a swig of soda, and scratching his balls every now and then while stupefying himself into a coma by watching meaningless cartoons on the couch.

I envied that mofo sometimes.

In a tiny whisper, she said, “Are you going to tell him what happened?”

“With Taylor and I?”

“Yes,” she answered, looking around the bathroom for spies. “You know he’d kill you AND Taylor. I can tell he really loves you and I think knowing about you kissing his brother would kill him.”

I pretended to consider it carefully. “Um, yeah. Good call. I wouldn’t want to hurt my hunka-hunka-burning-love like that. Do you think I should keep it from him?” I tried to look as ashamed as I possibly could. Meanwhile, I was secretly undressing her with my eyes.

It’s good to be a guy sometimes. We never have to worry about tact or decency as long as we fake it well enough.

She nodded enthusiastically. “I doubt he’ll understand.”

“I think you’re right.”

Brooke sighed and made a face as she noticed her smeared makeup in the mirror. “I don’t know about you, Abby, but I’m starved. Feel like grabbing a bite to eat?”

I grinned excitedly. I was so relieved everything was okay between us again. “Sounds great.” We linked arm in arm and headed out of the bathroom.

“Oh, wait,” Brooke exclaimed, stopping dead in her tracks. “Don’t you have to finish serving your detention?”

I waved at her passively. “I think Taylor can handle it, don’t you?”

She winked. “Yeah, let’s get outta here. I have a hankering for some chilidogs!”

Good Lord, I hope we won’t have to crack a window on the way home.