My Page

 

          Hello, and welcome to my page. You probably are here because you:

+ Got here on accident

+ Have no clue what you’re doing still reading this

+ Are really bored and have nothing else to do

Or, the most likely reason:

+ All over the above.

If none of these apply to you, than you were either invited here or you came here for some other reason which I’m sure is fascinating that I’d love to hear all about sometime later. I shall just have to wait in dire anxiety until then, I suppose. Well then, now that we’ve established whom you are, lets move on to my page now, shall we? Well, to put this shortly, this page is for me to use to organize all of my pounds and pounds of various *crap* I feel like sharing with the world. And, because I have a page, I can do just that. So, without further to rant on, I give you:

 

 

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Do not read this site if you have in the last hour: drank milk, swam, coughed, yawned, sang, itched your nose, or returned from a delightful trip to Chicago with your Aunt Marge. Do NOT while you are here: spin in circles, feed your dog, talk to yourself, smell your thumb, or leave the page home alone. Side effects of reading may include: Nausea, Stomach Flu, Internal Bleeding, Hair Loss, Strange Body Odors, Vomiting, Sneezing, Cancer, Boils, Warts, and Excessive Flatulence. Results May Vary.

Please Note: I am not in anyway responsible for any injuries, deaths, or spontaneous combustion as a result of you viewing my page.

All names used here have been changed to protect the guilty.

You break it, you buy it.

You have been warned.

In very tiny print.