Make It A Wonderful Christmas.

I was talking with a woman who had recently survived the death of her husband, had been diagnosed with cancer, and who had lost her job where she had worked for 18 years. She said, "I feel like my joy has been stolen. I just don't have a heart for Christmas this year. I feel as if I am standing outside myself, while I go through the motions."

Christmas is supposed to be a time of joy. But for many people it is not; especially when they have suffered loss or have a rough time healthwise. I too have had this experience. Here are the six things that have helped me get into the Christmas spirit:

Admit to yourself, to God, and to at least one other person that you can't get into the mood. The process of articulating your blues is therapeutic all by itself.

Get out your decorations. Many of them have stories that will remind you of better times. Sometimes we get so caught up in the struggles of the moment that we have tunnel vision. All we see is the present darkness. Remembering other years can help to widen your perspective; you will realize that some good things have come to you over the years.

Pick a few of your favorite people and call them. When you hear their voices, you will feel a little joy slip into your heart. Share your stories. The weight of your burden will be lifted.

Instead of just sending out Christmas cards, write a "year in review" letter about your life and the life of your family. While you may acknowledge the difficulties you have faced, you will probably be able to find some good things to write about as well. Writing these things down can be very healing.

Go to Church. The Christmas story is about believing in what seems to be impossible. Namely that in a world of sickness, suffering, war and death, God is with us. Healing is possible, peace is always just around the corner, and death brings eternal life. Dwelling on the thought that with God, all things are possible will allow a little hope to slip into your heart.

Bless someone you don't know. Contribute to a toy drive. Drop a $20 bill into the Salvation Army kettle. The more "foolish" you are, the more you will know that it's a wonderful Christmas, after all.





Dr. Greene is an ordained minister of the United Church of Christ and a resident of Richmond, IN. He is also the author of Feeling Better: The Wisdom of the Doc, You Can Feel Better: How to cope with chronic pain and physical disabilities, and co-author of Walking Free: the Nellie Zimmerman Story.


For further information about his books, please visit www.densmorereid.com

To return to the column list, Click Here